Tacky Christmas present ideas

This is the finale for Two Cents Worth and 2006, hope you enjoyed the previous ones.
So, have you got all your Christmas shopping done and bought tacky gifts for those you do not care for?

Proper etiquette calls for a thank you to the gift giver and a smile on your behalf. Once it’s all said and done, donate the item to the Rotary for its annual auction come February.
We received an electric skillet from a relative who had been recently married. Inside the skillet was a card to them from whomever gave it to them. At least it’s something that is used in this house.
The Mrs. received a cordless iron one year from me but mind you…it was per her request as she wanted one.
My ole buddy Ruby told me her Jim had given her a box of kitchen items one year and added, “The damn box is still in the garage too.”
Had mentioned to my sister what I got the Mrs. this year for Christmas and older sister said, “I’d stick it up your &$$ too.”
How about a baseball hat with a fake pony tail out the back?
How about a used vacuum cleaner?
Another bud says he request money, give me money. Said he’s very picky, odd to fit and it is hard to please as a stick in the mud. His 60th birthday is coming in January and being a diabetic, guess he’ll receive something sweet from his bud in Texas.
How about a T-shirt with a Unicorn on it from a convenience store with the price tag attached?
How would you like a year’s subscription to this newspaper?
One gal said she received a six months supply of diet pills and the $200 for them showed up on her credit card.
Another said she received a “Lighthouse” cookie jar that once opened; it made the sound of a fog horn and scared the liver out of you.
Ain’t no joke, I received a chunk of coal one year, boxed and gift wrapped.
One said she received a paper shredder for Christmas. Said she should have used it on their marriage license.
Of course some say underwear is the worst Christmas present, but I look forward to some new drawers each year.
Some really tacky gift suggestions include: Beano, adult diapers, a back shaver, nose hair trimmer, rectal cleansing pads, menopause pills, and a pair of socks.
Just think about it for ten more days and you’ll find out if you’ve been naughty or nice.
Merry Christmas.
Adios